Being Selfless

What does it take for someone to be selfless in hard situations? It is hard to get past, hey what about me, I care about you, but hey what about me!  The changes in someone else can only help us change right?  However, what if you focused on changing yourself within instead of trying to elude the other person to change.  At this point, I know your thinking man this sucks, because what about me!  I’m only the way I am because the people around me react a certain way and I need to speak my truth to tell them they are wrong. Are you right, or only right in your own head? How often has “your truth spoken” got you in positive happy situations?  I am extremely guilty of this, I must react and speak my mind because heavens I must inform the person they are absolutely wrong.  However, what would happen if I stopped, held my tongue and just thought and prayed for God to help me respond.  I have NO IDEA because I never do it.  Wow that is a problem I need to change.

The bible states in James 3:2 “We all make many mistakes. If people never said anything wrong, they would be perfect and able to control their entire selves, too.”  Wow, God knows that I make mistakes and can’t control myself, I SHALL RECEIVE GRACE!  However, that doesn’t invite me  to continue on my own path of wisdom and truth to set others straight.  Setting others straight with “truth bombs” can sometimes invite unwanted consequences.  How can one get past this? You ask God for wisdom in every moment of your life, not just the emergencies.  In James 1:5 If you need wisdom, ask our generous God, ans he will give it to you. He will not rebuke you for asking.”

How can I set my path right before God, to learn to tame by over flowing tongue?  Remembering that a gentle answer turns away wrath, but a harsh word stirs up anger, Proverbs 15:1.  I should seek wisdom and pause, because wisdom is better than my own personal truth bombs.  It is okay not to respond to someone right away and say you know what I’m upset, I need to sit and pray about this situation. I think we all can learn that our reactions to unpleasant events can invite positive or negative consequences into the situation.  Being truthful is Gods way, however truth in love is how it is delivered and sometimes it takes a lot of love to get to the truth.  So I am choosing to be selfless and hold my tongue that wasn’t meant to be tamed so I can better serve my God in everything I do.  selfless love

“Let us not love with words or speech, but with actions and in truth” -1 John 3:18


Life has a way of trying to trip you up every now and then.  It’s like God is showing you paths and you decide which path you are going to take.  You may ignore signs, interpret signs falsely, or think you know what you are doing.  My whole life I thought I knew what I was doing. You see I have that type A personality that needs to be in control, I have a hard time trusting people to do it the way I would want it done or think it should be done, I have too high of expectations on how people should be or act,  my life was perfectly planned and I couldn’t even deal with a piece of wood being thrown at my feet to trip me up.  When life trips me up, I fall apart.   However, I’m learning I have absolutely no idea what I am doing.  This is not about me.

I have suffered loss in my life, however most people have.  I have thought selfishly enough is enough God, I have had too much this isn’t fair. I have thought what am I doing so wrong God?  Growing up as a stutterer, marrying someone I should not have, a death of a child, a failed marriage, remarrying someone who I thought would fill me, having multiple children,  giving up a career to raise my blessings,  a rocky 2nd marriage and my last child having special needs.  At some point you feel like you give and give, that you start questioning what is the purpose of all this God? Then I stop and think how selfish I have been thinking I deserve a life filled with no hardships just because I think I have had enough.

Our paths lead us to other paths, however no matter what paths we take, God is trying to make us end all at the same road.  Being a good and faithful servant.  I don’t know what I am doing and that is okay, this isn’t about me anymore.  This isn’t about me trying to fill my holes the way I think they need to be filled.  I need to find rest, trust in God and let God do his work on me to get me on the road he wants me to be on.

Proverbs 3:5-6  5Trust in the LORD with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; 6in all your ways submit to him, and he will make your paths straight.